Questions...???

What is this? Why is it so? Why are we so concerned all the time? Why so much stress.. So much tension all around us? N most of all why so many questions? Why cant there be just answers.. Solutions? Why do we need to ask always.. Whether its right or wrong? Whether its good or bad? Whether it will benefit or not?
Surprisingly all our life's important decisons have these questions associated to them. And in most of these cases we fail to find answers.. Hence more questions n more stress. Its weird though.. We are taught to think in questioning terms but never to reply. We are always told to think twice n ask ourselves these questions befor taking any decision and we do that too.. But surprisingly none of us ever came up with the concept of finding answers.. Or find solutions or being rational without requiring any questions.
Moreover whatever big happens in our lives.. Good or bad.. Leaves us inevitably in a bigger pool of questions.. Questions to which we never find answers. There's absolutely no one to help us find those answers cos everybody is messed up in their own life's questionnaire.. Seeking answers.. And so we get used to this living.. With question marks all around us.. And ourselves so busy living life like this that we dont care to know any answers.. I hate the " being used to " part of life.. The stupid compromise that we just give in to. Why does life have to be so complicated or confusing? Why cant it just be?

If only someone has the balls to reply to this.. Help me find some answers , please do so. I'm all ears!

losing your mind is not a luxury of the middle class

Often we dont realize sumthing's terrible unless its spoken out loud to us. Sometimes we just dont get the intensity of a situation, or extent of an action, unless someone voices it into our ears, loud and clear. And then yet some other times, it really takes some solid spoken words to bring us face to face with brutal reality, to shake us to the core and wake us up.
It was just another movie i bumped into while channel surfing.. dunno what made me stop surfing there.. but sumthing did and i started watching it. In few minutes i realized the context i was in w.r.t the movie. There had been a death.. a husband had died, leaving a young wife behind, who was crazy in love with him. Typical, isn't it? The wife was being a total mess, all alone at home, karaoking with the tv, alone on her bday.. her house looked like a big pile of garbage... when her frends and family pop in to wish her.. or perhaps just to make sure she's alive!! Anyways, if you still haven't guessed the movie i'm talking about.. its "P.S. I Love you".
This scene that i refer to now, has a significance.. One of these frends who arrive, tries to help this young widow clean herself up, and they get to talking, when the frend says precisely these words : "Losing your mind is not a luxury of the middle class". And it strikes me.. like a hot iron rod.. trust me i haven't been able to get these words out of my head ever since.
How true and how simple to get, if only you know how to figure this out and accept it on your own.. but we don't. We need somebody else to tell us..somebody else to force some wisdom into our heads once in a while.. and not silently.. but in loud clear precise words.

I had been in a familiar situation recently.. lost my dad to cancer.. and ever since then, i'd been a lost soul myself. I don't know what i'm doing or why.. what i want to do in future.. for whom.. and how.. i have got absolutely no clue. And surprisingly this is coming from someone who used to be an avid dreamer, planning life ahead... thinking things through.. It is a difficult time.. i wanna give up sumtimes.. simply because i can't handle it.. but then these words ring a bell.. n i'm brought back down to earth.. i'm reminded i don't have that lousy option to just give it all up. Its unfair.. how those who want it never get it.. and those who don't, aren't even given an option to pick, they are simply taken. My dad was always full of life.. cracking jokes, bringing humour to life.. and was so looking forward to getting well soon, and getting his life back.. but he never got a chance to choose or decide.. he was simply taken, and he had to give in.. I'm angry cos this is unfair.. its our life on paper.. and somebody else fools around with it in practice, and we never get a say in it. Its the planets and the stars and the gods who decide.. then how does it get to be called ours?

Sometimes we have so much in our heads, so many things in our mind, so many words juggling up, that we just need to spit them out on a piece of paper to find some peace inside of us.. but even with the most perfect of words ready, most perfect of sentences put together, we just can't do it. I, for instance, wanted to come back and write, since like forever.. but just could never do it. even with all the free time i had to spare, all the free time i planned on spending in here blogging.. i couldn't do it. It just didn't feel like the timing is right.. or if i shud do it at all..

I mean, think about it.. why do people write? Even in the busiest of lifestyles today, with hundredrs and thousands of frends around, millions of social networking sites available.. why do some, off the bunch, still write it out? Isn't that a lttle silly.. or perhaps ironical!! Often in the crowd, there is a possibility to feel lonely sometimes.. Often the loner in us wants its space to breathe.. or maybe shout out to the world to tell it still exists..

I dunno.. i may not be making much of sense here, but i do know, sumthing inside of me wants me to keep typing.. just like that.. and i love doing it.. just for the silly sake of writing. Why is it suddenly so important.. like i just have to do it.. like i can't do without it? Its weird these questions keep poppng inside my head, and i keep jotting them down, but i never bother to really go out and look for answers.. I dunno.. but its just so much content in writing these down, that i dont really feel the need to know the answers.. the questions are good enough to keep me happy.